• SallyAnn Gray

Finding Love During Quarantine

Updated: Apr 26

First, I want to I want to take a moment to extend my love to you. The last few weeks have been chaotic for so many of us. It's hard not to feel anxious and hopeless. I want you to know you're not alone.   It’s no secret, these are unsettling times. As the Coronavirus continues to spread and prevention methods cause disruption throughout the country, all over the world, and in our daily lives, we can find peace in the fact that social distancing doesn’t have to mean social disconnection.

While headlines from the news and on social media may instill powerful waves of anxiety and fear, know that love is infinitely more powerful. During tough times, love provides a sense of unity which reminds us that our individual actions can significantly impact the lives of the people around us. While this epidemic is certainly not ideal, it does create an opportunity for us to express our love in a thousand out-of-the-box ways. 

The coronavirus has actually opened new dating possibilities.  We have seen an increase in people wanting to connect. People are reaching out more because there is a desire for connection. They are working alone at home, cancelling all travel and other social plans. They feel very lonely and isolated. As the saying goes, crisis equals opportunity!

This is a great time to get to know someone quickly—it is like being thrown into a life-raft together in the middle of a storm. Are they proactive? In denial about what is happening or super risk-takers? Are they germophobes? Caretakers? Making lemonade out of the pandemic lemons? Super worried or laughing about what is happening and sending you funny videos about toilet paper? You can get lots of info about your new matches right away. Plus you now have a chance to meet and connect at a deeper level, rather than just on the level of appearance! You can get to know each other’s core personality, whether you are on the same wavelength, have similar values, goals and styles of relating. Even though these are uncertain times, it's crucial to remember that we can choose how we respond. We can embrace the space to reflect, re-prioritize and be open to the new, hidden opportunity. You may think that all is lost -- that the love and relationship you long for is even more out of your reach. But, far from it! As I often say, love is an inside job. This is an opportunity to go within and become the high value individual who attracts the person you REALLY want. 

If you continue to date face-to-face, make sure you and your partner are being cautious. I encourage all my clients to use their best judgment during this time, and to abide by the latest guidelines from the World Health Organization. 

Prior to your date, I would ask, "How are you feeling? Have you had any symptoms? Do you have any fever? Do you feel comfortable going out?” These are all reasonable questions that cover a few bases regarding one’s general health. Be mindful that there are prohibitions on group gatherings, restaurants have a takeout-only policy, and many movie theaters are closed. This may throw a wrench in your plans, but getting a cup of coffee and going for a walk in the park or having a 'paint n sip' night of your own are a few ways you can enjoy each other's company without encountering large crowds. Discuss any potential date-options with your partner and decide what's right for you two. Going out may pale in comparison to ordering in for a game night, or having a mini potluck featuring your favorite dishes before binge watching a show.

If you find yourself not wanting to risk exposure to the outside world, opt for a virtual date instead. With this type of dating you can connect on a different, slightly unconventional level. You and your date may be a little skeptical at first but give it a shot! It can be tons of fun and add a little mystery to your new-found relationship. Click here for tons of virtual date ideas https://longdistancethings.com/virtual-date-ideas/

You can also watch a movie simultaneously or cook the same meal together over video chat. Netflix even offers a "watch together" feature, enabling viewers in two different locations to watch the same film or show together. Who says video calling has to be one-note? Mix it up, make it sexy, and be creative with your potential love. 

You can even use this time of quarantine to jump start a little self-reflection. Use this downtime to reassess your goals for the year, the progress you’ve made accomplishing them, and the next steps you plan to take. Social distancing is a great time to spring clean, purge those old items from your closet, and get back to some much-needed self-care. If you find yourself in need of a pick-me-up, I am offering free mini sessions

for a quick chat 

https://southcarolinamatchmakerscoaching.as.me/letschat. This is an unfamiliar situation to all of us and we’ll need each other to get through it. 

Life is full of unexpected twists and turns; and although it’s inconvenient, this experience doesn't have to stop your dating life in its tracks. Be open and flexible, knowing that your ability to go-with-the-flow will create plenty of "remember when" moments you can laugh about in the future. The significance of an emotional connection is severely underrated in lieu of a physical relationship. Use these days and weeks to firmly establish your emotional bond sans distraction, and when you’re both comfortable, reunite with your significant other for a romantic evening.  

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